Friday, March 26, 2010

Move Forward!

Things are changing.

Change is constant.

Life is short.

Generally, I'm not all that introspective. Recently, however, I've been doing a lot of soul searching - asking God a lot of questions and wanting to make something of this life I've been given. I'm cutting my losses, removing relationships that are not helpful, and pursuing those that are mutually beneficial and God-ordained.

It's my hope that anyone reading this blog post will do the same. Remind God of His words and promises to you. Read the prophetic words that have been spoken over your life. Move forward into all that God's called you to accomplish. Don't allow others to speak doubt and unbelief into your life. Refuse to allow others' opinions to sway you from the path God's called you to walk - regardless of whether they like it, understand it or support it.

You are a unique creation with a specific and special place in this world. You're important and needed. Don't give up on the dreams God's given you. Move forward!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

A Season of Dissonance

My dear friend and former roommate, Merari, was praying for me over the phone last week. She referred to the current "season" of my life as a season of dissonance. As she continued to pray, she correlated this season to a musical score and how the use of dissonance gives the listener a cue that a change is coming.

Webster's defines dissonance as:
1 a : lack of agreement; especially : inconsistency between the beliefs one holds or between one's actions and one's beliefs b : an instance of such inconsistency or disagreement
2
: a mingling of discordant sounds; especially : a clashing or unresolved musical interval or chord

Since early last year, I have been in transition. There have been many moves and changes. Though I have grown in a multitude of ways, my deepest growth has been in my trust and reliance on God.

On June 1st I moved from Franklin, TN to Orlando, FL. I spent three months there before moving to the Denver, CO area. Needless to say, nothing has been easy. It's been sad to see that many people I have loved and considered family have seemingly forgotten about me - out of sight, out of mind. It's been frustrating to feel "homeless", "restless", "forgotten"...For the first time in my life I have battled nearly debilitating depression - feeling I'd rather go to heaven than remain here. It's difficult to even share this part of the journey I've had over the past nine months & I'm certainly not sharing it in an attempt to gain sympathy. I want to share what God has done and is doing through this journey.

I can't express the thankfulness I have for my family, friends and Magellan! People (and pets) who have prayed for me ceaselessly, loved me continually, & supported me constantly. They truly believe in me and my desire to follow God - regardless of what it looks like or requires - whether they understand it or not. One thing God has shown me through this journey is what a true friend looks like. He's shown me what love is & He's healed me from the depression I was being oppressed by. He's an amazing God.

We all need those who will pray, love and trust us unconditionally. My prayer is that I am a friend/family member who exemplifies those qualities to those in my life.

The journey continues & as I've written before, God gave me the word "transformational" for 2010. Things are changing - in my heart, in my mind, in my emotions, in the physical realm around me along with the spiritual realm. Things have been dissonant. However, I believe God is the ultimate conductor of my life & that "mingling of discordant sounds; especially : a clashing or unresolved intervals" will come to an amazing climax & surprisingly fantastical resolve...as I continue to pursue Him with all I am...He is faithful & He continues to transform me - from glory to glory!